Getting squished

I "raced" Simon to the window to wave goodbye to Jeff when he left for work. I said, "You beat me to the window!", to which Simon answered, "Yeah! I always beat you at everything."
Good grief.

Simon poured water all over his hands, then put his hands on my arms and neck. I asked what on earth he was doing and he said, "I'm putting cold hands on you so you'll freak out!"

Simon has a little harmonica. He said, "That's what I'll do! I'll play music for the Lord when I grow up, with my harmonica!"

Simon: "Sit on me!"
Me: "Why? You'll get squished."
Simon: "But I love getting squished! It's fun."

Me:" Simon, are you going to eat or what?"
Simon: "What."

This has happened before, but I'm going to write it down so I don't forget. Simon calls his comforter and "comfortable".

Simon: "I'm going to teach my teacher at school how to sign 'pay attention' and 'I love you'."