Foul Tastes

Simon: "You're an employee, just like Dad, except you're my employee. Do you know where my employees go? They stay in my closest until they're ready to come out and work."
Me: "What was your favorite thing about school today?"
Simon: "You."
I love my little smooth talker.

Simon: "You're an employee, just like Dad, except you're my employee. Do you know where my employees go? They stay in my closest until they're ready to come out and work."

Simon: "Mom, how do I make my hiccups hic down?"

I gave Simon an allergy chewable, but it was grape flavored. He screamed and ran down the hall, waving his arms around. When he finally swallowed, Simon grimaced and said, "That tastes foul!"

Simon just came running into the room in nothing but his underwear. He stopped and shouted, "My legs are abandoned!"

Simon liked an idea I had, so he came and wrapped his arms around my head. He said, "I'm trying to hug your brain."

My 31st Birthday Gift From Simon

This is what Simon gave me for my birthday. The second heart is engraved with "I love you."

Simon picked the engraving for the box. I love it! It's dripping with his personality!

A Quest

Simon: "Mom, did you know that soap is made out of ivory?"
Guess what brand of soap we have?

Me: "Simon, go make your bed."
Simon: "I wish I'd never been born because then I could just do back flips in your tummy all the time."

Jeff and I were talking and Jeff mention the word "sister in-law". Simon asked what Jeff was talking about and Jeff answered that he was talking about my sister. Simon asked what "in-law" meant and, once Jeff explained, said, "I think "in-law' means you get to tell people what to do because mothers-in-laws get to boss you around." Once Jeff and I stopped laughing, Simon explained that he knew that "because of the story of Ruth. You know, in the Bible."

Simon: "Dad, your nickname is Mr. Genius!"
Me: "What's my nickname?"
Simon: "Baron Von Mom."


Simon is coloring a picture of King Tut. He says, "He's going to be in style!"

Simon: "All they do is sit around all the time."
Me: "Who?"
Simon: "Presidents."

Simon: "Mom, I think you're actually quite interesting."

Simon: "Do you want to know my pulse? It's five, because I'm so tall."

Simon: "I'll make a quest for you when my work is all done."
Me: "How are you going to do that?"
Simon: "I'm going to hide my work and give you clues, and you're going to have to search for it, and there will be a map.