Mulch

Simon gave me a big hug and said, "This is how you turn an enemy into a friend."

Jeff was poking me. Simon shouted, "Stop picking on my mother!"
Ha ha, he took my side!

Simon: "Today at school, a lot of kids were running. They accidentally knocked me over."
Jeff: "Are you okay?"
Simon: "Yeah. I just fell in the mulch."

Simon: "Do I have hair on my chest yet?"

Simon was humming to himself in the car this morning. All of a sudden he got really upset.
Simon: "Jesus doesn't love me!"
Me: "Of course He does!"
Simon: "But the song says, "red or yellow, black or white" and my shirt is orange!"
I had to explain to him that the song was talking about skin color. It took a minute to get him to calm down; he was very sure that Jesus had a clothing preference.

Jeff got cut off twice yesterday. After the second time, Jeff asked, "Am I invisible?"
Without missing a beat, Simon answered, "Yes. Yes, you are."