Texas Hold-em

Jeff and Simon were playing Uno. I heard Simon ask Jeff if he knew any card games. Jeff said he would teach Simon fifty-two card pickup. Simon asked, "Can you teach me Texas Hold-'em?"
Jeff answered, "Maybe."
Simon queried, "Do we play for our lunch money?"

Simon when we told him to get ready for bed: "Hey, hey, ho, ho! This here kid just won't go!"


Simon is going as Captain America for Halloween. I must say, he's pretty darn cute.

I told Simon a joke.He immediately said, "Ha ha ha! That's a crude joke!"
I answered, "That joke wasn't crude!"
Simon asked, "Oh. What does "crude" mean?"
I told him that a crude joke is usually one involving toilet humor. He laughed and said, "Those are only for little kids!"

Simon: "Does it hurt to pull a  muscle in your foot?"
Me: "Yup. Why do you ask?"
Simon: "I'm going to walk with cloven hooves so that I pull a muscle."
Huh?