Butterflies

Simon: "All superheroes have a weakness, just like I have a weakness which is macaroni and cheese. And pizza. Deep dish."

Simon (looking betrayed): "Why are they called butterflies? They're not made out of butter!"

Simon: "Mom, why did they name the game 'Simon Says' after me?"
Simon: "We're the Dude family. You're Mom Dude, Dad is Dad Dude, and I'm Simon Elias Dude. Grandma is Grandma Dude and Papa Rich is Rich Dude."

Simon hit his head and started crying. I asked where he hit it and, after pointing out the sore spot, Simon started sobbing, "I hope it's not my frontal lobe!"

Simon: "I don't know what to write a comic about! My mind is blank. All I can think is stuff that already has been made, like Simon's Cat."
Me: "Well, I like your Stick Dude comics and Hot the Hot Dog is really cool."
Simon: "Well, I can't do those because I'm moving on to more advanced stuff."