Christmas Morning, 2013

Just the three of us.

Jeff thanks Simon for his Christmas gift: hockey stick pencils and some journals.

Simon gave me a book about dragons.

Simon with all of his new Lego and Megablock sets.

I taught Simon how to yo-yo.

Building Lego sets

Green Lantern ring.

I'm ruined!

A conversation that I was told about this morning:
Sunday School Leader:"When the angels appeared to the shepherds, how did the shepherds react?"
Simon: "They FREAKED OUT!"
Teacher: "What's another way of saying that?"
Simon: "Panicked?"
Simon: "What is it with me and physical philosophies?"

It's hard not to laugh when you're disciplining your kid and he starts sobbing and repeating over and over, "I'm ruined!"

Simon: "I want to go on vacation. Where can we go?"
Me: "Where would you like to go on vacation?"
Simon: "Can you give me some options?"

Simon was given a little Nativity Scene snowglobe at church. He went running to show Jeff, yelling, "Look! BabyJesusinasnowglobe!" all in one breath.


Simon: "What is is with me and dad and violence?"
Me: "What are you talking about?"

Simon: "Well, we both like sword fights and stuff."

Buoys!

Me: "The book you wrote is great, Simon."
Simon: "Yes! It is!"
Jeff (sarcastically): "Wow, way to be humble."
Me: "Simon, when someone gives you a compliment, you say 'thank you'. People need stay humble."
Simon: "What's "humble" mean?"
The more Jeff tried to explain, the more confused Simon got. Eventually, Jeff just yelled, "When someone says something nice, just say 'thank you'. You don't need to yell, "I'm awesome, sucka! Eat it!"
I laughed so hard!

Simon: "What are those?"
Me: "Buoys."
Simon: "What?"
Me (slightly louder): "Buoys."
Simon: "WHAT???"
Me: "BUOYS!"
Simon: "What's "boobies"?"

Simon: "You're cool, Mom!"
Me: "You're cool!"
Simon: "You're awesome, Mom!"
Me: "You're awesome!"
Simon: "Wow! I can't believe you said that to me! Thanks!"

Love is Weird

Simon: "Were you and Dad boyfriend and girlfriend before you were husband and girlfriend?"
Me: "We were."
Simon: "And you loved each other so much that you just had to get married?"
Me: "Yep. That's what happened."
Simon: "Love is weird."

Simon: "I sure hope my graham cracker doesn't turn mean and attack me."

Simon: "As people get older their attention span gets shorter."
Jeff: "Yeah...I don't think that's true."
Simon: "Yes it is. I read it in my Garfield book."


Me: "Are you excited for school today?"
Simon: "Yeah! Well, maybe. Not the writing part."


Simon: "I made up a new song and I don't remember how it goes, but it's called "Darn". I  made all of it up."

Simon: "Mom, what do you have to say? You can tell me anything."

Simon: "Having hot dogs for breakfast is kinda like having dessert for breakfast because it's sweet."
Me: "Hot dogs?"
Simon: "No, pop tarts ."
That makes much more sense.

Shake-sphere

Simon: "I'm practicing the first step of being a ninja, which is sneaking."
Me: "What's the second step?"
Simon: "Um...I don't know!"
Simon has a playdate with a little boy who actually lives in our apt. complex! He is so excited: "Mom, I will play whatever he recommends! If he has a brother or sister, I'm even okay with that. As long as it's not a baby. Babies freak me out!"

After seeing the Olympic Torch being carried by the astronauts today, Simon grabbed his toothbrush and said, "This is going to be my Olympic Torch. I just need something to light it on fire with."

Simon: "Can you help me draw the Gulf of Mexico with a tornado on it?"
Me: "Why do you want to draw that?!?"
Simon: "So I can make a forecast."

Simon: "Look at this trick! I'm trying to impress the ladies."
Me: "What ladies?"
Simon: "You."

Simon: "Can you save the Pringle container? We can use it for the rest of school about cylinders. Also, it can remind me of the beautiful chips I love."

Simon: "They (his friends) live behind the swimming pool, in our territory."

Simon:  "I think there is a roller coaster where you are in this cage thing and it goes up and down real fast.  I think it is called the "Shakespeare' (shake sphere)."

Dead Man

I went in to tell Simon he could get up from his nap. He put his hand over his chest, took a big breath, and said, "Whew! I thought I was a dead man!"
I guess he thought he was too noisy at nap time?

Simon: "Can you help me draw the Gulf of Mexico with a tornado on it?"
Me: "Why do you want to draw that?!?"
Simon: "So I can make a forecast."

Simon: "Look at this trick! I'm trying to impress the ladies."
Me: "What ladies?"
Simon: "You."

Simon: "Can you save the Pringle container? We can use it for the rest of school about cylinders. Also, it can remind me of the beautiful chips I love."

Chest Hair

Simon: "You know what I want for my birthday? A lightsaber! So I can cut the cake with my lightsaber and it has to be a real one so I can use it to cut my cake."

Simon wandered into the room, pulled his shirt up, and asked, "Do I have chest hair?"
I said, "No. You won't for a long time."
He answered, "Phew! Just checking."