Love is Weird

Simon: "Were you and Dad boyfriend and girlfriend before you were husband and girlfriend?"
Me: "We were."
Simon: "And you loved each other so much that you just had to get married?"
Me: "Yep. That's what happened."
Simon: "Love is weird."

Simon: "I sure hope my graham cracker doesn't turn mean and attack me."

Simon: "As people get older their attention span gets shorter."
Jeff: "Yeah...I don't think that's true."
Simon: "Yes it is. I read it in my Garfield book."


Me: "Are you excited for school today?"
Simon: "Yeah! Well, maybe. Not the writing part."


Simon: "I made up a new song and I don't remember how it goes, but it's called "Darn". I  made all of it up."

Simon: "Mom, what do you have to say? You can tell me anything."

Simon: "Having hot dogs for breakfast is kinda like having dessert for breakfast because it's sweet."
Me: "Hot dogs?"
Simon: "No, pop tarts ."
That makes much more sense.

Shake-sphere

Simon: "I'm practicing the first step of being a ninja, which is sneaking."
Me: "What's the second step?"
Simon: "Um...I don't know!"
Simon has a playdate with a little boy who actually lives in our apt. complex! He is so excited: "Mom, I will play whatever he recommends! If he has a brother or sister, I'm even okay with that. As long as it's not a baby. Babies freak me out!"

After seeing the Olympic Torch being carried by the astronauts today, Simon grabbed his toothbrush and said, "This is going to be my Olympic Torch. I just need something to light it on fire with."

Simon: "Can you help me draw the Gulf of Mexico with a tornado on it?"
Me: "Why do you want to draw that?!?"
Simon: "So I can make a forecast."

Simon: "Look at this trick! I'm trying to impress the ladies."
Me: "What ladies?"
Simon: "You."

Simon: "Can you save the Pringle container? We can use it for the rest of school about cylinders. Also, it can remind me of the beautiful chips I love."

Simon: "They (his friends) live behind the swimming pool, in our territory."

Simon:  "I think there is a roller coaster where you are in this cage thing and it goes up and down real fast.  I think it is called the "Shakespeare' (shake sphere)."

Dead Man

I went in to tell Simon he could get up from his nap. He put his hand over his chest, took a big breath, and said, "Whew! I thought I was a dead man!"
I guess he thought he was too noisy at nap time?

Simon: "Can you help me draw the Gulf of Mexico with a tornado on it?"
Me: "Why do you want to draw that?!?"
Simon: "So I can make a forecast."

Simon: "Look at this trick! I'm trying to impress the ladies."
Me: "What ladies?"
Simon: "You."

Simon: "Can you save the Pringle container? We can use it for the rest of school about cylinders. Also, it can remind me of the beautiful chips I love."

Chest Hair

Simon: "You know what I want for my birthday? A lightsaber! So I can cut the cake with my lightsaber and it has to be a real one so I can use it to cut my cake."

Simon wandered into the room, pulled his shirt up, and asked, "Do I have chest hair?"
I said, "No. You won't for a long time."
He answered, "Phew! Just checking."